“God did not intend…
…for you to live this way, for you to
behave like this, for you to have this much, for you to be with that
person, for you to think like that, for you to know more than…”
God did not intend. It’s a precarious statement that is, unfortunately, used regularly and often.
“God did not intend…” I say knowingly, claiming the knowledge of
the divine’s mind as my own. I know, therefore I can judge, hate,
separate and dismiss.
God did not intend, I say to those
groups I don’t like or that person whose choices don’t coincide with
mine. I don’t like you because you are everything I have learned is bad,
and, by the way, I have an investment in being good so watch out.
I need to take care of my “goodness points”; my very life, or after
life, depends on it. You and your badness bother me. Your existence
sullies mine and if I get too close I might even get some on me. Yikes,
can’t have that. I’ve worked hard for these points.
In
Western Christianity this idea is wrapped up in the Doctrine of Original
Sin; the package that delivers a lifetime of sin, repentance and
struggle to each of us with a salvation embossed bow.
Here’s
how it works. We are each born naturally bad. It is human nature. We
are “sinful and unclean” and “in bondage to sin and cannot free
ourselves.” Goodness is outside of us, badness inside.
Enter religion, God, Jesus, Elohim and… you get the picture; the goodness we need is in them.
Religion is about reigning in our naturally bad tendencies that we
cannot, on our own volition, handle or delete. If goodness is outside
of us, we have to get it inside, and the church is our vehicle.
We get baptized, take communion, go to temple, pray daily, contribute
time and talents, and otherwise work to fulfill the prescribed formulas
of getting the good in, and subduing the bad.
A letter was
posted on Twitter last week. It was a scanned copy of a handwritten note
from a father to his gay son. The brevity of sentiment was as heart
wrenching as the overall message: I no longer recognize you as my child.
In a few poorly constructed sentences, a father abandons his role as
parent, guide and unconditional giver of love to his child.
Ouch. One of those scribbled lines of communication said this: “God did
not intend for this unnatural lifestyle.” And so… because I know what God thinks, hopes and wants, I am justified in turning my back on your existence.
No, that’s not okay. The truth is, we don’t know. Nobody does.
But we need an excuse to hate, and God is convenient. We use
religion, God, and the Doctrine of Original Sin to demarcate our
judgment and hate within categories in which we have become all too
comfortable operating; good and bad.
I am good, you are bad, so I get to hate, shame, judge and despise you and do it feeling vindicated and pure.
It’s a shame - on us and our knee jerk reaction to the hurt, pain,
and suffering caused by humans. Rather than admit we occasionally
deviate from our natural good nature, we blame our sometimes bad choices
on the fact that we are born with a predilection toward the bad, dark,
shadow….and poor us, we just can’t help it.
I don’t buy it. It’s simply intellectually lazy, unhelpful, unhealthful and unreasonable.
Western religion begins and ends with the Doctrine of Original Sin because we need a safe and acceptable place to house our fears of the “other” and fear of our own wants and desires.
No more. We need to reassess and move on.
It is time to let go of this idea – this “Doctrine Default Demarcat-er” – and rehearse a new mantra.
We are born good. Kindness, love, empathy, compassion, generosity…these are all our natural response.
We are self-determined and have the capacity to choose, do and live good.
“We” are good. We. You and me. Him and her. Them and us. We are all good, which is the beginning to changing everything…
Monday, August 13, 2012
Thursday, August 9, 2012
God's Values on NPR
Americans often speak of core values: some are patriotic and American,
some God-centered, while others are strictly Christian. But really, what
are they? What are these values tossed about to validate positions,
prejudices and partisan politics?
In the August 9, Morning Edition interview with Sofia Martinez, she and her co-worker answer this by talking about needing “a good moral compass” and mention the “desensitization of our children to violence and sex…” They say it like Democrats and Obama himself have created the world of violence and sex on the internet, TV, films and elsewhere. Can anyone say “deregulation?” Be sure to follow it up by “Republican”.
Finally, the co-worker proclaims her vote for Romney because he is “closer to God’s values.”
Ok. And what are they?
The Old Testament God is angry and jealous as often as He is merciful and just. This God destroyed the entire city of Jericho; men, women and children. This is the very same One who commanded a father to kill his son.
What values are “God’s values”?
Jesus in the New Testament repeatedly acted on behalf of those members of society who had been put out, ostracized and oppressed because they didn’t fit into the boundaries carved out by religious law. Hmmm, think of gays and lesbians, immigrants and non-Christians. Seems Jesus might be willing to stand up for their inclusion rather than exclusion.
Again, what values are “God’s values” and who, pray-tell, gets to decide?
We frivolously lob, fling and chuck the language of morals, ethics, good and bad as if it were a game where the winner gets to be the true American. We then tie them to “a God” (my God, my Rules, my Righteous hate), and skewer those not “like us” with the spear of being “immoral” and without values.
The message: If you don’t believe as I do, if you don’t worship the same God in the same way as me, or come to the same “God-given” conclusions, then I get to label you as immoral.
This is a dangerous and irresponsible game. And, it is our country, our children and our future that is getting hurt.
In the August 9, Morning Edition interview with Sofia Martinez, she and her co-worker answer this by talking about needing “a good moral compass” and mention the “desensitization of our children to violence and sex…” They say it like Democrats and Obama himself have created the world of violence and sex on the internet, TV, films and elsewhere. Can anyone say “deregulation?” Be sure to follow it up by “Republican”.
Finally, the co-worker proclaims her vote for Romney because he is “closer to God’s values.”
Ok. And what are they?
The Old Testament God is angry and jealous as often as He is merciful and just. This God destroyed the entire city of Jericho; men, women and children. This is the very same One who commanded a father to kill his son.
What values are “God’s values”?
Jesus in the New Testament repeatedly acted on behalf of those members of society who had been put out, ostracized and oppressed because they didn’t fit into the boundaries carved out by religious law. Hmmm, think of gays and lesbians, immigrants and non-Christians. Seems Jesus might be willing to stand up for their inclusion rather than exclusion.
Again, what values are “God’s values” and who, pray-tell, gets to decide?
We frivolously lob, fling and chuck the language of morals, ethics, good and bad as if it were a game where the winner gets to be the true American. We then tie them to “a God” (my God, my Rules, my Righteous hate), and skewer those not “like us” with the spear of being “immoral” and without values.
The message: If you don’t believe as I do, if you don’t worship the same God in the same way as me, or come to the same “God-given” conclusions, then I get to label you as immoral.
This is a dangerous and irresponsible game. And, it is our country, our children and our future that is getting hurt.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Following Myself
We can follow all kinds of people on Twitter, but at this point in my life, I am interested in following myself.
I came late to the controversy that hovered around Ashley Judd’s puffy face in March. At the time I was embroiled in my own battle with vindictive women who would rather break down another younger, intelligent and vibrant woman than admit they were wrong.
Since leaving that position and place, I have rediscovered my voice, strength and passion and am finally following myself. This is not an easy or comfortable road to take. Our cultural norms direct women to follow a man, fashion trends, gossip and just about anything or anyone that will keep us thin and attractive.
In her article “Ashley Judd Slaps Media in the Face for Speculation Over Her ‘Puffy’ Appearance” Ms. Judd boldly engages the media and everyone else who continues the tradition of claiming ownership over the bodies, minds and existence of women. Go Ashley! As a pastor, I was measured and assessed regularly. There was no part of my body that was off limits. Every Sunday there was at least one comment about what I was wearing, how my hair looked or if I had gained or lost weight. Most people were concerned with whether or not I was appropriately dressed for a religious leader, which basically meant I needed to not look like a woman. No obvious curves or signs of sexuality. It was only months after beginning at my first congregation in Queens, NY that I gave up my red lipstick (which I loved to wear – MAC Russian Red!). Judd bravely names patriarchy as the source of such promulgated misogyny. She’s right. She also states that patriarchy is not limited to men, but is kept alive by both genders. Right again. Following myself instead of the direction and intimidation of patriarchy in our society is hard to do. It is a big risk to take. The bulls eye target becomes etched on our person just as Hawthorne’s “A” was fixed on Hester in “The Scarlet Letter”. When we dare to own ourselves, refuse the lower rank beneath men and do not agree to compete with other women for men’s approval of our beauty, mind or actions, we are a threat. Funny how the letter “A” was scarlet; the very same color of my Russian Red that agitated so many good Christian folks. We need to “Reclaim the Red” and all that it means for the power of women!
I came late to the controversy that hovered around Ashley Judd’s puffy face in March. At the time I was embroiled in my own battle with vindictive women who would rather break down another younger, intelligent and vibrant woman than admit they were wrong.
Since leaving that position and place, I have rediscovered my voice, strength and passion and am finally following myself. This is not an easy or comfortable road to take. Our cultural norms direct women to follow a man, fashion trends, gossip and just about anything or anyone that will keep us thin and attractive.
In her article “Ashley Judd Slaps Media in the Face for Speculation Over Her ‘Puffy’ Appearance” Ms. Judd boldly engages the media and everyone else who continues the tradition of claiming ownership over the bodies, minds and existence of women. Go Ashley! As a pastor, I was measured and assessed regularly. There was no part of my body that was off limits. Every Sunday there was at least one comment about what I was wearing, how my hair looked or if I had gained or lost weight. Most people were concerned with whether or not I was appropriately dressed for a religious leader, which basically meant I needed to not look like a woman. No obvious curves or signs of sexuality. It was only months after beginning at my first congregation in Queens, NY that I gave up my red lipstick (which I loved to wear – MAC Russian Red!). Judd bravely names patriarchy as the source of such promulgated misogyny. She’s right. She also states that patriarchy is not limited to men, but is kept alive by both genders. Right again. Following myself instead of the direction and intimidation of patriarchy in our society is hard to do. It is a big risk to take. The bulls eye target becomes etched on our person just as Hawthorne’s “A” was fixed on Hester in “The Scarlet Letter”. When we dare to own ourselves, refuse the lower rank beneath men and do not agree to compete with other women for men’s approval of our beauty, mind or actions, we are a threat. Funny how the letter “A” was scarlet; the very same color of my Russian Red that agitated so many good Christian folks. We need to “Reclaim the Red” and all that it means for the power of women!
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Dump It
My book, Religion Made Me Fat, narrates a good dump.
Like most good dumps, it can take some time and effort to complete the process, but when finished, we feel lighter, healthier and just better.
It all began in earnest on the day my dad brought a load of crap to my house. He was retired from being a pastor and bishop, and had time to clean out closets and garages and no longer thought he and my mom should have to keep my junk. So he came with a load from my past - high school, college, Peace Corps, graduate school. It was my turn to decide what to do with all the shit.
He left the boxes in my back yard with a question: What of it did I want to keep and what did I want to take to the dump?
Keep or dump, became a central question for my life and decision making: who was I going to choose to be, what would I choose to believe and how was I going to choose to interact and behave in this world.
As good as an individual dumping can be, we do not live in a vacuum. We are part of a larger community and society. Our culture has a collective story that shapes how we think of each other and which dictates laws and policies about how we can treat each other.
We need to take a societal dump.
Like most good dumps, it can take some time and effort to complete the process, but when finished, we feel lighter, healthier and just better.
It all began in earnest on the day my dad brought a load of crap to my house. He was retired from being a pastor and bishop, and had time to clean out closets and garages and no longer thought he and my mom should have to keep my junk. So he came with a load from my past - high school, college, Peace Corps, graduate school. It was my turn to decide what to do with all the shit.
He left the boxes in my back yard with a question: What of it did I want to keep and what did I want to take to the dump?
Keep or dump, became a central question for my life and decision making: who was I going to choose to be, what would I choose to believe and how was I going to choose to interact and behave in this world.
As good as an individual dumping can be, we do not live in a vacuum. We are part of a larger community and society. Our culture has a collective story that shapes how we think of each other and which dictates laws and policies about how we can treat each other.
We need to take a societal dump.
- We need to let go of the Doctrine of Original Sin
- We need to move beyond the Doctrine of the Atonement and the notion that there is a “heaven” somewhere out there that is better than what we have here. (As opposed to a new $5m study.)
- We need to stop using male centric language to refer to a deity, including “God”.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Blair Dodges Fresh Air
Listen to Terry Gross interview Bishop Blair and then read Religion Made Me Fat. http://www.npr.org/programs/fresh-air/
This is the bishop the Vatican appointed to reorganize the Leadership Conference of Women Religious. This group of women religious have been told they are doctrinally out of line with the teaching of the Catholic Church and are now fully under the direction of the male hierarchical leaders.
Bishop Blair is asked about issues such as women's equality in the church, birth control, homosexuality and more, but consistently appeals to "faith in God" and the "direct teachings from God" in answer to the interview questions. There is no reasonable engagement of these contemporary questions.
If this conversation frustrates you or causes you to wonder about faith assertions inserted into the domain of public policy, as well as evaluate the worth of women and others, then read Religion Made Me Fat.
This is the bishop the Vatican appointed to reorganize the Leadership Conference of Women Religious. This group of women religious have been told they are doctrinally out of line with the teaching of the Catholic Church and are now fully under the direction of the male hierarchical leaders.
Bishop Blair is asked about issues such as women's equality in the church, birth control, homosexuality and more, but consistently appeals to "faith in God" and the "direct teachings from God" in answer to the interview questions. There is no reasonable engagement of these contemporary questions.
If this conversation frustrates you or causes you to wonder about faith assertions inserted into the domain of public policy, as well as evaluate the worth of women and others, then read Religion Made Me Fat.
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